thoughts of a lost...

i had been off for long...was away from all my routines.
when i came bak to whatever i left behind...i had an empty mind...
i wanted to write on many a topics..but whenever i sat down to scribble i realised
i had lost my mind..my thoughts and creativity..i was numb..( or am numb :-) )
then i started contemplating for long..what shud i rite..for i have an empty mind..
back in my home land...there are lots of paddy fields...once the harvest is up...a gloom
descend on those fields..the deserted emptied fields.
i have no plans 2 talk further on those fields...but when i thought abt my mind..i couldnt
think about any thing but those fields..it takes another season for those fields go green again..
i had seen kids flyin kites in those open fields..with a competitive spirit..
a contest for nothing but for a feelin of heart..a warm delightful feeling...i never had a kite..
i never knew to make them either..i just used to go there and sit there watchin the skillful pilots..
and those kites kissin skies..then i own one of those kites mentally and wish for its victory.
my mind is a kite...
a kite with a broken string..its just floatin around...with no destinations..am heading no where..
at times thoughts takes wings and i fly out..but where to?
they lead me to labyrniths and i keep gettin lost.. yes am lost...
all am reminded these days are about losses...
i know they are just not mine...u too have your share of them.
the only common thing we share with any unknown human is despair....
is it what i want to write about today???
am i to talk about the despair of this world and mine in particular..
never....am never gonna write about despair..for its well within us..
it needs no blog to get into u.
where am i now?
what am i tryin to put across ??
when i run thru these scribbled lines...all i know is..am again lost...lost in yet another labyrnith...